One leader’s answer to disengagement

We recently published the 10 Qualities Of A Mindful Leader and wanted to expand on each of the qualities, to bring them to life with some personal examples of people we’ve worked with. 

We’ll be exploring the impact that embracing the kind of habits that enable these qualities to shine has had on them and their teams. 

This week we’ll be looking at the transformative power of Emotional Intelligence.

Jane, one leader we worked with recently, was feeling exhausted after a period of organisational change, and exasperated that her team didn’t feel very engaged. A couple of key team-members had been made redundant, another had moved on voluntarily and the team had really lost its va va voom. She was at a loss as to how to turn things around.

I asked Jane what she perceived the barriers to engagement to be. Too much change was the main response, but when I asked how both she and the team were feeling about the changes she drew a blank. It seemed that she had been so busy actioning the change and making sure new processes were in place that she hadn’t had the time to check-in with her own emotions, or those of her team-members.

We explored how she could make a habit of connecting with her own feelings more, and as part of an activity I shared a list of feelings and needs and asked her to speak about any that sounded relevant to her at that time.  

She realised she’d been feeling a lot of guilt for asking more of her team when they were already under pressure. She really wanted to support them but was feeling pressured to keep things running smoothly as the changes took place. She realised her needs for care and stability had come into conflict. She also felt anxious because she had a strong need for approval - both from her boss and her team. 

She realised she hadn’t taken the time to really connect with the team and understand where they were at, which had possibly caused them to disengage. 

As Jane had found being able to label her emotions and connect them to her underlying needs really helpful she was eager to sit down with her team and get them to do the same. 

‘Lonely’, ‘sad’, ‘anxious’, ‘exhausted’, ‘rudderless’, ‘stressed’, ‘isolated’ were just some of the emotions that came out from that activity. She was pleasantly surprised at how open people were with exploring the list - and how balance and support were two of the needs that were driving those emotional states. 

As a group they agreed to repeat the feelings and needs activity in their team meeting each month. 

By helping to surface what was going on for her, Jane was able to help others to do the same. Ironically, the process itself automatically helped people to feel more supported, and better able to create a sense of balance through sharing their experiences. 

Within a matter of months we were thrilled to hear that the team was feeling much more positive and that a sense of joy and connection had returned.

How emotionally intelligent you are is not fixed - with the right habits and processes in place, Jane was a perfect example of how it is something that can be improved over time. 

We’re running a free webinar for leaders who are interested in leading more mindfully on September 20th. To find out more and register for a place click here.